4 Years of Marriage

Today is our 4 year wedding anniversary. It has been four years filled with lots of highs and lots of lows, yet here we stand, together still.

Our wedding story is super untraditional. We originally planned to elope in Vegas. We were going to go down for my birthday and get married on October 10, 2014. We began planning a reception that would take place back here in Minnesota in January. We booked a venue, I bought my dress, things were going smooth. Then I found out I was pregnant with G. Vegas plans were cancelled and we changed our would be reception in to a full blown ceremony.

We planned an entire wedding in a four month time span. Cake, photographer, food, flowers, DJ… the whole thing. It was a whirlwind.

The day of the wedding, I decided we would wait to see each other until the ceremony. No sneak peak. No hiding behind a door to say hello. Full on first time seeing each other was at the ceremony. What. A. Mistake. I balled like a baby when I saw my husband for the first time. He had cut his long hair off and was standing at the front of the room ready to promise a future together forever.

My mother-in-law officiated the wedding and I wrote the entire ceremony, including the vows. It was truly beautiful. Towards the end we did a sand ceremony in place of a traditional unity candle. Mr. B, myself and B and D each poured sand into a picture frame and then we announced the gender of G and what his name would be. A surprise for everyone in attendance.

Nothing about our relationship or our family has been traditional. Nothing ever goes as planned. Even on the day of the wedding there were hiccups. But somehow we always manage to work through them. Our relationship is far from perfect. If someone asked me for marriage advice, I’d likely direct them to the nearest couples counselor rather than defer to any sage advice I may have. I do know that we have a love that will never die and through the highs and lows we call on that love to get us through.

We don’t always make time for each other, we don’t always do the little things they recommend. But there is one thing that we do follow. We choose each other. Every. Single. Day. We continue to choose each other. Some days other things might come first… like the kids, work, writing, the need for time alone. But we still make the conscious decision to be with the other person forever.

I also rely heavily on my relationship with God to help shape my relationship with my hubby. Cliche to some but my relationship with God has gotten me through some dark times and continues to do so. I firmly believe that God keeps our relationship strong.

After nearly eight years together, four of which we’ve spent married, we’ve added two kids to the mix and spend every day choosing this life over and over again. I know that the future won’t promise a life of ease but I also know that if we continue to embrace our love and choose this life that we can get through anything the world throws our way.


Author: Brixanne

mom, step mom, wife... all the $#!+ they don't tell you about motherhood

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